My children are growing up awfully fast. I can’t believe it was such a short time ago we were planning a family, all excited and full of expectations. I can’t believe it was so easy to make them. I can’t believe it was so wonderful to carry them inside of me (I really loved every minute of it). I can’t believe that it hardly took any pushing at all to bring them into this world. I can’t believe that part of my life is in the past. A few months ago S had a vasectomy. It was choice we both agreed to. We definatley didn’t want to have any more children. 2 for me, and 3 for him is enough. That, and having ppd after both of my pregnancies was tough on our family and friends. We are happy with our family and want to concentrate on loving them and growing them into wonderful people.
This past couple of weeks though I have had my heart stings tugged once or twice. I see a baby on tv and my heart wells with longing. I would love to bury my face in the softness of a new life. The little folds between their elbows and knees are captivating for me. How sweet the smell is when you rest them on your shoulder and their head falls into the nape of your neck. Ahhhh…pure heaven. I have thought about having another baby for sure. Surprisingly I am not too sad that that part of our lives is past. I am happy knowing that we did a great thing having our children. There are no bad memories, or things I would have done differently if I could do it again. I look to the past few years as a joyous time and with the warmest heart.
But, if I could just snuggle a little baby for a day or two (not at night of course, I like my sleep) that would be great too.
